It’s 3am. I’m staying another night or two at the cabin of a new friend, and long time Heron Dance reader and supporter back in the North Carolina woods. I’ll leave in the next day or two for Asheville. It was a little rainy today. We walked down to the Yadkin River with our dogs, then had dinner with another Heron Dance supporter who offered to match all new contributions from readers. I’ll post the details shortly.

I’ve been thinking lately about sculptor Tom Jay, who was a poet and salmon protection activist.

I once swam down the Duckabush River in a wetsuit and mask. It was during the dog salmon run, and there were a lot of fish in the river. The current ran both ways that day. I came to a deep pool where a river eddy had piled a perfect pyramid of golden alder leaves. Farther on, resting in the shadows by a large, submerged snag, I mused on what I’d seen, when I noticed a shape move behind the snag. It was a large dog salmon, splotchy grey and yellow, vaguely striped, probably a male, spawned out but alive in his eyes. We were a foot apart. I looked into his eye. He saw me but did not move. I was just another river shadow, an aspect of his dying, an aspect of his marriage, another guest at the feast. He was the eye of the resource, the subterranean sometime King, fish-eyed inscrutable god, alder-born-elder, tutor. . .
     - Tom Jay, The Salmon of the Heart

There have been at least two men who passed through my life and offered friendship, but whom I failed to connect with in any kind of deep way despite my respect and regard for them. In both cases, I blame myself for not putting more effort into the potential friendship. Tom Jay was one. He was a man of deep integrity, of creative vision. A man who loved wild salmon. He was highly critical of himself, and I guess I felt I would fail to live up to the standards he set for himself or his friends. Poor excuse.

In the little time I spent with him, I learned a lot. I think of him often. In my journaling, I sometimes turn to him for guidance and often seem to quote him in Heron Dance.

Tom’s large salmon sculptures can be seen in a number of public places in the Seattle area. He was a poet. He was an authority on the study of etymology, the history of language.

Here’s a Youtube interview of Tom Jay.

Excerpts from my interviews of Tom Jay (Civilization Is Entropy In Drag).

Journaling question:

What possible friendships would you regret, if, as a result of death, you were no longer able to pursue?